I don't know what's wrong with me. I am so tired. Can't seem to do anything. I have no strength. I get worn out so fast. And I have SO darn much to do. I think I'm depressed. I cry at the smallest things. I get upset all the time. I am just so tired. I lay in bed at night, thinking of all the things I need to do. I can't sleep. I have to get up and take a sleeping pill. Then I have to get up at 6 am to get my grand daughter on the bus. It's getting daylight again now, so I stay up.
Already today, the sheep were outside the electric fence. In the rock garden. I was on my way down the driveway to plant some flowers under my farm sign when I saw them. They must have just gotten out so hadn't done much yet. The little piece of field fence was down. SO I ran and got some feed and got them back in the sheep yard. Then had to fix the boundary fence to get them over next door for a few days. The grass in that yard in nice and pretty tall and so green now.
I was going to mow along that fence so the sheep wouldn't be tempted to go under. But the grass is so tall, the mower keeps shutting off. And it wears me out to have to crank it up every few minutes.
But earlier this morning, I tried the new milking machine on Zarah. I had put her kids up last night so I could milk her. I could not get ANY suction. Nothing. I tried the bigger machine on Penelope. No suction on that one either. So had to hand milk them both. I got so upset and just cried buckets. I feel so useless. I know it's something simple that if my husband were here, he could get it going. It just makes me mad. And I cry some more. Poor me.
I did make some farmer's cheese for a farmer's get together and seed swap tonight. I want to go so bad. But it starts at 5 and goes til 9. Right in the middle of milking and feeding times. Aren't these farmer's too? Don't they have evening chores to do too?
And now my camera is not working. Something about the lens. I should know not to carry it in my pocket all the time. And I just got it not long ago.
I think I'll go back to bed now.